If I had a pill to take away the shadows …
It happened again last night. I almost never used to dream. Just a scatter of shattered images in shades of red and black. I tried to turn on the light but it became darker.
If I could only take a sweet medicine …
The shine of her eyes with the mask of my face reflected in them. She seemed to want it even more than I did. She didn’t struggle. Her face haunts my dreams more often now.
If there was some way to stop.
This is a darker dance. We turn gracefully, now with eyes closed and fall in slow-motion as the floor swallows us. Pray you never experience the fall. Pray hard my friend.
falling allows you to see the world from a different perspective – if you never fell – you would never have transparent eyelids and write like you do – such melancholy and honey – my heart screams – get the spoon!
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I almost get the sense of emotion when you speak thus.
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you are gifted beyond comprehension – or you must have a secret muse.yet another riddle from you that I can’t sieve – “you almost get the sense of emotion”. Explain please.
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I do not feel as you seem to. Logic works for me as emotion may for you. I sometimes get a brief spark – like a door cracking open behind me. It is always closed when I turn around.
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thats the difference that attracts – remember from before? you have empathy although you say you are not swayed by emotion. at work i have to deal with logic – its hurts the soul so i when i am home i allow emotion to control and it heals. the words you use are everyday words but they say more – so i keep coming back and looking and just allowing the words to flow – are you new to writing? where have you been hiding?
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Logic is cleaner than emotion, empathy and intuition. From this perspective there are serried ranks of ordered ideas. Pure and sharp. I have been writing creatively since 14:33hr 22 June 2013. Hiding?
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Wonder why you never showed up sooner if you had been writing that long. Maybe I as looking in all the wrong places. Logic is cleaner – agreed and sweeps everything leaving no room for doubt or argument. Cold and distant. I have to be like that sometimes and I wait to get back into my own skin. But if it inspires you – I am not here to judge – just read the lines that you sculpt out of the ice cold logic.
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There are more paths up the mountain than man can comprehend or follow.
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Think you need to know you can be treasured. Maybe that’s the door or path you need.
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When I breathe in, the air treasures me, when I walk, the earth treasures me, when I turn my face to the sun … etcetera.
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OK understood.
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I foresee that you will lose your patience.
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Quite the opposite. Stepping back to scrutinise and be quiet and still.
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Beware of shame. I have watched this in others. It appears to hurt. You have nothing to be ashamed of.
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Noble and kind, you aren’t the pscyhokiller, think you need rebranding, but it’s ok your secret is safe with me, I keep secrets well and all things done in secret with secret thoughts and whispers. I had to sleep with shame and let her tell me what she meant and I awoke with the thought, she is conscience when man start to lose sight of what is right.
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To be fully conscious of shame is to be free from its bite. Keep your mind open. I awoke with a hard … but I digress.
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ok I will try. But a bite keeps things in check, how do I resolve that in my mind? Would you help me understand such wicked thoughts. Meanwhile can I be of any help with your digression?
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Embrace or desist. Any other path will confuse. It is hard to know how you can help. What would you suggest?
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I was offering help not suggestions. That is your duty.
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I’ve seen shame change people. Vacant or vacuous I think the correct term is.
Would apologize for my writing but I trust you know this isn’t my first language.
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Statistically speaking it is most likely that Finnish is your first language, however it is very likely that you will have studied English at school since your pre-teen years therefore you have little excuse.
Are you saying that you have observed that shame makes a person seem to be more empty of emotion?
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The finnish language feels so primitive compared to english. And yes, either that or they’ve learned to hide their emotions well. Really well.
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Some have emotion that they hide. Others do not have emotions to hide. Do you fit into either of these categories?
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You showed a beautiful side of yours through this piece.
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I do not know how you define beauty.
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in my experience………i always need a pill, a bitter one, after i pray, to make it stop…….from getting worse……but i always pray…..and it always gets worse…..
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Your words push me inside my mind and make my leg twitch as if I have fallen asleep. But I have not.
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they have always been unpredictable…….i have learnt to appreciate any semblance of reaction to them….
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Do your words have a life of their own? I have read that some live apart from their creation.
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if they do, they never cared to tell…..
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Then you are in control. Accept that responsibility. Exercise that power.
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again, i do, every time i write……..
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Good.
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